Humanity pt. III

People are killed for money, power, and just the hell of it. Children are battered and abused and betrayed by the very ones that are meant to protect them. Young girls are sold because there are men who are willing to pay for them. The color of one's skin still determines how they are treated and what opportunities they are given. Society always finds someone to discriminate against. Comedians find rape jokes amusing and the audience finds them entertaining. Girls are taught from the youngest age that they are not good enough. Animals are tortured for amusement. Money is the highest being to be worshiped. Women are told they are not accomplished until they become a wife and a mother. Politicians care more about winning elections than making a change. The Earth is being destroyed. One in three women are sexually abused because society teaches "don't get raped" instead of "don't rape." Arrogance, greed, lust for money and power, pride, self-love, vanity prevail.

There is no hope.

Humanity pt. II

Humanity is disgusting. We think ourselves to be so civilized and advanced and intelligent but we are none of the above; we are barbaric and hateful and stupid, and apparently doomed to continually repeating the mistakes of our past. (If you are not on a similar level of despair, watch the movie Crash. By the time it's over, the only thing you will want to do is weep for the human race.)

I have a decent life. I'm fortunate enough to have a home to live in (a fairly nice one, at that), food to eat (such an abundance that I have the luxury of being picky and choosy), am able to get an education at an institution of my choosing (and study whatever "pointless" things I so choose) -- the list could go on. I have what I need, and much of what I want, but then I get to thinking too much, and I become filled with despair and frustration and indignation. Because when I look just past my immediate, rosy little bubble, I see the reality of the world: sex trafficking, rape, child abuse, racism, sexism, domestic violence, murder, homophobia, religious bigotry -- violent destruction with no end in sight.

The people of this world have been beaten and battered and abused, and the Earth along with them. Not only can we not take care of and protect each other, we can't even take care of this planet that sustains us. If we have made any progress as a species, it is minuscule.

Humanity is disgusting.

Unconditional Love

Unconditional love is a puppy (whether it is two months or twelve years old). When they let you blow in their face or take their paws to make them dance or mummy wrap them in blankets or pull on their ears, without so much as a snip or a bark; when you leave them for hours or days or months at a time and every time you come back, they're just as happy to see you; when you neglect them and forget to take them on a walk, but they don't have the capacity to hold a grudge; when they follow all your ridiculous commands and put up with your teasing just to get a treat and give you kisses just as soon as your face is in reach - that's love. Unconditional love is man's best friend.

The Worst Part of Being Lied To

"The worst part of being lied to is knowing that you weren't worth the truth."
And ain't that a bitch.

Knowing that someone close is lying to you and trying to figure out why can drive you mad. Especially when it's someone that you trust. Someone that you have a solid relationship with. Or so you thought. That's the worst. Giving trust and receiving none in return.


Trust is a fickle thing. It can take years to build, and only a few words to destroy. And after it's gone, well I'm not quite sure what happens then. You can try to go back. You can try to rebuild it. And you can -- but only to a certain point. Because forgiving is easy but forgetting...forgetting is the hard part. It's hard to forget the feeling of betrayal. It's hard to believe the words that you want to but can't. It's hard to go back to the way things were because it's hard to forget that you were only second best. It's damn hard to forget that you weren't worth the truth. The doubts, the insecurities -- they're not so easy to just wipe away.

I hope I learn how to wipe them away, and soon. Because sometimes, it still kills me. It's time to move on but I can't. Because forgiving is easy, but forgetting is the hard part.